The Puke Report

Here's the blog post that I was supposed to type up yesterday, written while watching rouge puke chunks fling around the washing machine...

As I watch the contents of Boo's bed slosh around the front loading washing machine at my parent's house at 4:50 am there's only one thing on my mind... when the heck did she eat fruit cocktail!? Sorry, that was uncalled for, but you need to know the state I'm in. Let me back up...

Mr. Wright had a golf tournament this past weekend and I was going to the women's conference at church. My parents offered to take the kids Friday night, and I would join them Saturday since I'm five years old and get scared staying home alone.

Friday night was picture perfect- the kids were great at Gami & Papa's house, all sleeping through the night and behaving. Now, in hindsight, I should have just left them there.

I arrived Saturday evening to kids who were getting a little cranky due to the close proximity to bedtime, but they were still generally behaving. We played, had dinner, and I put them to bed.

Literally the second I crack open my library book that I've been planning to read for 8 weeks Boo starts screaming. I rush upstairs because Boo just isn't a screamer when she's in bed. In fact, I think she screams more when you disturb her precious 13 hours of sleep she requires every night.

I find her screaming just to scream, and keeping everyone up in the process. I tried to get her back to sleep in her crib, but ended up bringing her to bed with me. After an hour of fun with that my mom had the brilliant idea to give her some juice in a sippy and put her back in her crib. It worked so it was easier to tell the tooth decay fairy to suck it... the sippy that is.

The rest of the night was peaceful, and my sister the Senorita even got up with my kids so I could sleep in a bit. (I had to write that, though it is true, so she wouldn't leave an angry comment... trust me!) Sweetie Pie wakes up with an upset tummy and is soon blowing chunks into Gami's beloved popcorn bowl.

We were supposed to head home but since Sweetie Pie was sick and I was avoiding my chores at home we decided to stay another night. A screaming night. It took until 11 pm to get all my kids to sleep, then I barely closed my eyes all the way when it was 3 am and there was more screaming. I restarted the movie and somehow made it back to bed.

Screaming log. Sunday, 4:30 am. Captain Jammie pants hears the distinct sound of a toddler who's about to get out-cried by her mama. I few upstairs, slammed the door open, and roared "GET IN BED... NOW!!" Sweetie Pie informed me that Boo was crying because she had yaked all over the portable crib. Awesome. Now I'm a crappy mom AND I got to clean up puke.

I threw Boo in bed with the big kids and dragged the crib to the craft room. I scooped the fairly solid puke out of the crib, flushed it, and carried the assorted stuffed animal and blanket causalities to the laundry room. Of course my mom has a digital washing machine from space that was hard enough to figure out in the daytime. I get it figured out, set it for heavy soil (I too was surprised there wasn't a puke setting... not that I'd be able to set it anyway) and realized that I was officially too awake to go back to sleep. At 5am. Super. I could still hear the kids talking to each other. At 5am. Did I mention it was 5am? This was going to be one heck of a day. I'm going to start by finding out where the heck Boo found fruit cocktail with chicken in it. My bet is Shoprite. They have everything!