Day 75- Trash Talk

I've always been pretty good about remembering to drag the smelly garbage can to the end of my long driveway, but this week it totally slipped my mind. Mr. Wright had even reminded me when he left for work but I was still fresh from dreamland with dried drool on my cheek and it didn't quite get filed in the 'remember this when you start to function' section of my brain. The next thing I know it's noon and the garbage truck is long gone. Normally we only fill our large trash can 3/4 full, but with all the extra garbage and packaging from Boo's birthday we were already trying to get too much stuff in there.

I'm Mrs. Wright, and I'm lazy, so when the main trash can in the kitchen gets full I pull the bag out and throw it on our balcony off the dining room... classy, huh? I could put it right in the large outdoor container but that would require a long walk down the stairs, going outside, and wearing shoes. Fairly often, I'm sure, I've been spotted wearing Mr. Wright's golf shoes, pajama pants, a tank top with no bra and messy, knotty hair trying to wrangle a bursting garbage bag that's dripping Spaghettio juice into the large container. It's a good thing that the paparazzi hasn't caught onto my awesomeness yet or I'd have some highly unflattering pictures in US Weekly. Anyway, to avoid the horrible tabloid pictures I just throw it out the sliding door... yeah, yeah, that's why.

This is way easier in the short term, but then on garbage day I have to collect all the nasty bags from the balcony, carry them through my house, and then out the front door to fill the large can. This is when Mr. Wright usually offers to roll the can to the end of the driveway if I fill it. I'm not sure why he thinks that's a deal that I'd be jumping for, but he keeps offering none the less. Sure honey, I'll do all the nasty parts and you wheel it out there... way to take one for the team. I mean, the driveway is long, but it's not like a mile long or anything.

Since he recently started reading my blog I'll post this special message just for him: That deal sucks, and you know it sucks or else you'd take up my offer to switch. Instead you just pretend that you forgot it was garbage day and then call me really early (where I have to run upstairs to find a charged phone) to tell me that everyone else has their trash cans out for collection. Don't think that I don't know what's going on here!

As if I'm not bouncing around with my garbage adventures enough I'm now going to ask you to remember the original story. I forgot to take the garbage out this week, even after Mr. Wright's kind reminder. I filled the can almost full with all the weeds from the front yard anyway, so I still have a bunch of birthday garbage on the balcony AND a full can. It was the worst week possible to forget of course. See, this is why I need an assistant! So who's bored to death!?